lately

If you’re ever needing a general outline of your frame of mind, check your google search history.  As you can see, mine has included some pretty lofty goals and then a curiosity for other things…that people do…that I just wanted to check out…be informed.  Really I wanted to read something that didn’t have any pre-requisites for the past year of my life because nothing says “must have been in treatment and still in recovery for an eating disorder, self harm and addiction.”  I know there are a million ways to lead a life, different paths and opportunities…it still hurts to feel doubtful of your own capabilities to amount to anything even if you’re not sure what “anything” means.  I don’t know many people in or out of recovery who don’t feel this way so I don’t feel alone, I feel….I don’t know how I feel, I’m looking up how to get a master’s degree while selling used underwear. I think that’s just a simple sentence:  I’m living.

4 thoughts on “lately

  1. Oh my gosh, my google history is absolutely embarrassing. Every odd thing I do or think I google it. And I’ve found that even the strangest things–someone else has been there. So smile, it’s all good because it has to be.

      1. LoL yes me too. I posted sometime last week about I recently googled. I think I told my T and now I’m wondering why I told him as well as why I googled it. But it was a good answer!! LoL take care and keep on googling.

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